How do you eliminate stress from your Life

Of late, people seem to usually discuss how stressful day to day life has become and how most of them are unable to cope with the same. I heard a very strong statement yesterday that “it  is stress which is running their life and not the other way around’. So on this Monday morning I decided to address this topic which  I believe most of us are overwhelmed with

To begin with the best advice given to me so far was to identify the source of the problem and nip the stress in the bud itself before it turned into a self made monster. By carefully editing  your life, and changing certain habits, you can eliminate most (if not all) sources of stress in your life.

I don’t believe that a stress-free life is possible. Stress is a response to challenges in life and a life without challenges is too boring to contemplate. However I believe that most of the stress in our lives is unnecessary and can be eliminated by taking some simple (and some not-so-simple) steps. It can’t be accomplished overnight — I’ve been eliminating stressors in my life for awhile now, and am still not done. But it’s a worthwhile goal especially with stress being the silent killer.

Some of the ways one can manage stress better would be to work on

identify stressors

This is the most important part of managing stress and spending even ten minutes every day on writing down what stresses you the most will go a long way in putting your thoughts together and prioritising your problems. Once you have identified the top reasons for your stress, you can then work on solutions for those which are workable and also figure out how to manage those which are beyond your control say like the daily commute in traffic ( I always make it a point to listen to some audio books while driving to make use of the time and also not focus too much on bumper to bumper traffic and succumb to road rage)

Procrastination

Procrastinating will always lead to stress sooner than later and more often than not I too have succumbed to this habit. learning from this self defeating habit is something I value the most. Stress builds up when you do tend to keep postponing things which are important. It is not easy to work on this habit but a bull dog like attitude will put you on the road towards not procrastinating.

Being Disorganised

I have observed that the most stressed people are the ones who are not organised in their lives. Be it waking up on time or paying their bills. When one is disorganised in certain areas of their lives it slowly creeps in to most other areas and makes one stressful and incapacitated. The thumb rule is always to do things before hand and have a working plan whether  be it getting your kids ready to school or even managing your daily commute.

Multitasking

I have mentioned in my earlier articles that Multitasking is the short cut for taking the stress road and it is something that one can work on immediately by just focusing on one thing at a time. I  agree that some are experts in multitasking but not all of us can excel in this. The smarter option is always to single task and move on to the next one in the order of priority.  You will be surprised with the effectiveness of focusing on one work completely. Some of the people who were considered experts in Multitasking have called me after a few months and shared their learning’s in not Multitasking.

Eliminate energy drains

All of us experience and come across certain kinds of tasks or people who sap our energy and leave us exhausted at the end of the day. Identify these tasks or people and cut them from your life or put in a workable plan if you cannot avoid them completely. There is a magic created  when one identifies a problem area and focus on the solution. The same law holds good with this too which should help you to manage your stress to a large extent.

Simplify Life

I am not advocating leading the life of a Buddhist Monk.  However when we are spoilt for  choice, stress creeps in since we are most of the time unable to decide on life’s choices say for example which channels to watch or what dress to wear or pick up. Simplifying your life always ensures you have few choices and it is easier to make those decisions. Try simplifying your life in one area to begin with say in your eating habits and then work your way towards other area. I have begun to simplify my life to a large extent but am still working towards a truly simple life. Try this one strategy if not anything else and you will be amazed with the positive impact it will have on your stress level.

Help others

Sometimes when our own plates are full this seems like biting on more than you can chew. On the contrary when you are compassionate and wilfully try to reach out to people and show that you do care there is a sense of calmness which will envelope you. However for this you need to do it with complete willingness and not hurry up on it. Even a small gesture of walking up to another person and checking on how they are doing will go a long way in creating a road map for helping others.

Exercise and Eating on time

Well this is something which is in your absolute control and if you are really committed  it can go a long way in eliminating stress from all other areas of your life put together. I have noticed that many people who exercise and eat healthy feel less stressed. It is also proven that both these factors play a critical role in eliminating stress completely from your life.

The idea is not to give you one glove that fits all situations but some practical solutions which according to me have worked. Usually I tend to work on certain things and only when I am pretty convinced that it really does work do I pen the same in an article or share it with my coaching clients to turn around their life.

I do hope this article makes a difference in the way you are managing stress in your life. Do share insights from your side and would love to hear if you do agree or disagree with any of my thoughts.

The Rule of One

Most of you, at times will be overwhelmed by the number of things you need to accomplish in a 24 hour day. If you feel exhausted by the sheer number of things you need to do in a given day,  you are not alone. All of us go through this at one point of time or another.

 Change is hard. Changing many things at once can be overwhelming and that’s where most people fail. They are overwhelmed mentally even before they even start. A year goes by and their goals remain nothing but figures and images continually spinning around in their mind. 

The rule of One ascribes to one working on one goal at a time and taking on another goal only when one has made the present goal a habit or if you are convinced that you will not let go of the foot on  the accelerator. I have realised that this is more practical than working on many goals at the same time and faltering with all of them.

Some of the goals you set  in your life could be - 
1.Wake up early
2.Get into an exercise regime
3.Clear all that credit card debt
4.Eat healthy
5.Kick a bad habit
6.Spend more time with your family.

Rank your Goals in order of importance:The first rule of thumb is to prioritise your Goals in terms of which one is the most important and critical for your well being. Once you have decided on that goal, say losing weight,  you need to put down an action plan  and start working on it immediately. I would suggest you to write this goal in your book with a clear time frame as to when you would like it to be accomplished. There is magic in writing your goals and this will shortly be the subject matter of a different article.

Focus on that one goal:It is easy to focus on one goal at a time rather than many. Experience has taught me that even if one trips while working on one goal it is not a big challenge to get back on track.It could however prove to be insurmountable if  one is working on many goals simultaneously. Therefore the secret is to work on one goal at a time diligently. Course correction is easier when we falter on one thing at a time rather than many at a time. This might take a couple of days or weeks but remember that at the end of the day the satisfaction one gets in achieving your goals  is beyond compare.

Fail proof your progress:Set a realistic time frame whilst working on your goals. Ensure that you are ready with the next goal when the present goal  has become a habit and is about to reach a stage where it will become a part of your life. This is where i have realised that writings down one’s goals in the old fashioned way really plays a significant role. In the present era of tablets/smart phones, taking a white sheet of paper and writing your goals down is far more precise than keying it in the digital medium. It’s not that I am against using  electronic gadgets.  On the contrary I would have not  been able to do carry out my  workday without them. Sometimes though with something like goal setting, one needs to experience the habit of writing it down in the old fashioned way.Personally, i feel more connected when I write things down physically.

Remember that by doing this you will fall in the 1% category of people who work on a goal, write it down and start working on it diligently irrespective of whether they have all the resources to achieve the end result. Many people indulge in goal setting especially during the new year, birthdays or  anniversaries. They will be charged up for a few days and slowly run out of steam over a period of a week or so.

Personally i have come across people who have multiple goals in mind and at the end of the day they will most likely falter in all the goals, thereby joining the remaining 99% of people who do not work with any goals.

I would like to challenge you to work on any one goal which is critical and which will have a huge impact on your life. It could be with health, relationship or in any other sphere of your life. Pick up the learning’s from this article and work on it from today. I can guarantee you that within a short period of time you will experience the amazing power of the Rule of One and in a matter of no time will be on your way towards working on bigger goals in your life.

I sincerely hope this article has  put you on the path of achieving all the goals which you have been putting off for a long time. Would love to hear from you on whether you agree or disagree with my thoughts with respect to the Rule of one on Goal setting.

Have a great day and a super weekend.

Take control of your days which are turning you crazy

Are there some days where you feel helpless and why something like this is happening to me? well most of us come across something like this during our work /home life and the best thing to do is not be too reactive but weather the storm to fight another day.

Of late during my coaching interactions, I come across many of my clients who are so stressed in life that they are not able to think straight and end up draining themselves emotionally. They end up feeling insignificant and there is no juice left in them at the end of the day. All they can do is head back home and hit the bed where sleep is usually difficult to come by. Well this might sound familiar to many, so let’s figure out how one can manage to work around this.

Block some time to gain control
Even though people say that their schedules are absolutely packed and they do not have any spare time to introspect, the plan is to make time. Whatever one’s schedule is, be it a CEO or an executive all of us are bestowed with only 24 wonderful hours a day and how we manage it is best left to our ingenuity. Do work hard in making some time to gain control of your life which is an extremely good habit to inculcate.

Make a list

Do you have a to do list which includes all your professional and personal work written down. If no, then this is the first step in working towards being more organised. Once the list of things to do is there in black/white or in some cases on your tablets/smart phones, then it is as simple as working on your priorities and knocking them off one by one. This may sound easier said than done but once you put in your action plan in the form of words then there is a sense of activity that will germinate in you and things will get more organised thereafter. Just like one carries a shopping list to the supermarket to ensure that we do not forget anything which is important, so does a to do list work for an individual to carry out the most important tasks for the day.

Plan your day

The best thing that one can do for oneself is to plan his/her day and nothing comes close to living a regular pattern which will over a period of time work to your advantage. It does not matter if one’s work or home schedule is unpredictable. To begin with focus on the small things which can be planned like getting up or even having lunch at a particular time.  You can then build things around this to achieve small victories. Try to have at least 15-30 minutes at the beginning of each day to plan your day out. This little time for planning each day is a simple and powerful way to gain control of a day which might go out of control.

Stop Multitasking

Well this is one reason most of them get perplexed. At one time it was a fad that the person who multitasks is a winner and will climb up the ladder pretty fast. Recent research has proved that on the contrary it is just the opposite and it is always beneficial in the long run to focus on one thing at a time and do it diligently.So if you are working towards developing a newly formed habit of multitasking then ensure you move out of it. One will immediately see results when one does not put undue pressure on oneself.

Control incoming communication

This is something which is in your absolute control. It is a must that you have a say as to when can you respond to people either reaching you in person or through phone/Black Berry/emails. I have noticed that people who immediately respond to any form of communication are the most stressed compared to people who take their time. When one is in that midst of doing something important then  it is always better to stay away from distractions. With technology making it easier to connect with someone in any part of the world it is always wise and prudent to control our incoming communication and stay in control.

 Review the day gone by

It is something that I learnt when my work had become hectic and was not able to finish my tasks in the stipulated time. When I looked at the day gone by I was surprised that I had spent 5-10 % of my time in doing things which did not help me become more productive. So I went back the next day with a new vigour of not committing the same mistake. This habit hardly takes time but can give one insights on how we spend our work or even our home life.

Set routine

Regular routines are the best way to ensure that your work at office or home is less stressful. When one works on developing regular routines then things do fall into place. Situations which were at one time chaotic and stressful will begin to fall into a pattern that can eventually be managed better.

So with this I would like to say that we cannot expect all days to be a Sunday but with a little bit of planning and discipline one can ensure they navigate through life with that much less  stress.

Hope this article impacts you in changing the way you function or better build on the habits which you have already cultivated. So do share with me your thoughts and your feedback on the same. Would love to hear from you on something better you have worked on in handling stressful days.